"I am not a rapist"

I did not bring up this topic yet, but this is what must be in many Indian guys' mind, even so many of my very sweet Indian guy friends. There is a problem, a huge problem, in India with men, the mentality towards women and rape cases, but this does not mean that all guys are rapists and also not that all guys have a bad mentality towards women. 

A Dutch girl told me last year: “I would never want to be with an Indian man, they don’t have respect for a woman, that is what is shown in the news”. A male colleague once said: “No I don’t want to go to India, their mentality is not good, I want to protect my girlfriend”. And recently someone else mentioned: “Well you are brave you can still go to India.” 

While I on one hand thought it is good, a bad publicity, now policy makers and others in India will be forced to do something about certain situations. But I also feel that the picture of India, especially of Indian guys, that is being created in some people’s mind, is disturbing. Should all now be afraid of any Indian guy, start denying them a place for internships? When seeing him think: “He can be a rapist.” I won’t talk good that there is not a problem and there should be no change within India. I am Indian and I have the right to criticize my country and its people. But also when criticizing, realize what you are criticizing and how facts may have been portrayed in a certain way to make you think in a certain way. And together with many women demonstrating, there have been so many Indian men demonstrating and speaking against sexual abuse that is happening. 

All in all, negative publicity can trigger change within a country, but the negative publicity should not be pushed to such an extent that the real cause we are fighting for (and rape is happening in every corner of the world) is forgotten and we use it in a way to generalize and discriminate.